After years of digital-first dating, more singles are now looking for love the old-fashioned way — offline — but some are finding it difficult.
Celebrity matchmaker April Davis, founder of Luma Luxury Matchmaking, says growing numbers of daters are leaving behind the swipe culture of apps in search of more authentic, in-person connections.
“Online dating and dating apps are ruining our culture and people’s ability to be in relationships. It really does have a negative impact on our world,” Davis said. “Theres too many options and people cant focus on one person. The truth is that most singles are struggling to find love. Theyve either been ghosted too many times, are burnt out of dating apps, or are exhausted by situationships and no-strings-attached flings. I’m happy to see people are doing more in-person dating.”
The trend is reflected in pop culture, too. Films like “Materialists,” starring Dakota Johnson as a matchmaker caught in a love triangle, and reality series such as TLCs “Match Me Abroad,” have highlighted the search for real-world romance over digital convenience.
Davis says that although the shift is welcome, meeting someone face-to-face is not without its own challenges, particularly for those accustomed to having an endless stream of potential matches at their fingertips.
“Approaching a romantic prospect is a skill,” she said. “Much has been made of the idea that younger generations have lost the ability to flirt, but really, the pandemic led people of all ages to lose a bit of social finesse.”
Among the biggest hurdles to offline dating: fear of rejection, unrealistic expectations, swipe fatigue, and a dating culture increasingly shaped by ghosting, breadcrumbing, and mixed signals.
Emotional detachment and a fear of vulnerability are widespread, Davis says, in part due to the normalization of casual hookups. “Real vulnerability requires risk, and laying your feelings out on the table feels like too much danger with too little returns,” she says.
Curated perfection on social media has also shaped dating standards by cultivating unrealistic expectations. “Every single selfie you see online is polished, filtered, and sometimes, even AI, yet we still pursue the same curated perfection we see online in the real world,” Davis says.
Davis says many of her clients describe dating apps as another full-time job.
“The cycle of perpetual swiping, awkward DMs, and ghosting really takes a toll,” she says. “Dating apps give us access to more potential partners than we could ever date, but instead of making the search for love easier, it actually does the opposite.”
That same cycle contributes to the rise of the flaky communication patterns that have eroded trust in dating culture.
“Ghosting and breadcrumbing are on the rise, making it even harder to build trust with someone new,” she says. Ghosting refers to disappearing from a conversation, date, or even an entire relationship without a word, while breadcrumbing refers to offering small, occasional signs of interest in order to string someone along without committing to a relationship.
Still, she believes finding lasting love offline is far from impossible — it simply requires a more intentional, strategic approach.
“Despite all of the modern dating challenges, finding love isnt impossible. Its just more complex than it used to be,” Davis says. “But heres the good news: you dont have to navigate it alone. With a more intentional approach, you can cut through the noise and find something real.”